TW: trauma (of course), SA, war/combat, etc.
Recently, internet reading communities have been re-recommending the 2014 book The Body Keeps Score. It has a pretty blue cover with Icarus by Henri Matisse, often paired with peaceful music and “Self-Help Books that Changed Me” titles by book content creators. I became curious, in the same way I now need to read Song of Achilles from how largely it made its rounds on my for-you page and friends’ goodreads lists.
The Body Keeps Score discusses the effects of trauma on the body by Dutch psychiatrist and trauma expert, Dr. Bessel van der Kolk. He goes through the book using real patient stories to discuss how it affects the psyche, the physiology of trauma, and different non-medicinal treatment methods. From a general perspective, the book is informative on the different types of trauma, how trauma survivors’ bodies and brains may respond and why, and ways people can approach their trauma to better themselves.
As someone who has gone through some trauma, I felt like the main messages were informative and helpful. I often considered my own responses to things when passages felt familiar and have been applying some of the more applicable methods he recommended. Despite this, I also felt like this book left me with a bad taste in my mouth. Too often the patient stories were discussed informally. It felt like taking the worst of someone’s life for entertainment, even if it eventually connected back to the point. I think these types of things should have been more straightforward. There were times when rape survivors were described as having an “aura of mystery” or were complimented for their looks. I looked into it and apparently the author was fired from the trauma center he started over undisclosed allegations of employee mistreatment. I can’t help but feel a bit jaded over this. Maybe while the information presented is informative, the personal flavouring by the author may not be so healthy.
Similarly, there was other language in the book that left me uneasy. Although I understood what he might have been going for, he says, “Attend any two-year-old’s birthday party and notice how little Kimberly will engage you, play with you, flirt with you, without any need for language.” I found it personally uncomfortable that he would suggest that a two-year-old would flirt with an adult– this, mind you, is an adult’s interpretation of that toddler’s behaviour. This gives me the same icky feeling of when a toddler is acting sweet to someone of the opposite gender and someone says that they’re going to have so many boyfriends/girlfriends when they’re older. Also, given that this book deals with many women who feel to blame for their father/uncle molesting them, I find it highly inappropriate. The book as a whole is not so awful, but these little things sprinkled in certainly taint it.
My last major issue was how the author treated misconduct by trauma survivors. I think many critical reviews of this book focus on the author’s telling of Tom. He was a Vietnam vet who after his platoon was killed went on to kill innocents in a village and rape a woman. He was never punished and works today as a lawyer. Dr. van der Kolk explains this behaviour as a result of his trauma. While that may have been so, I cannot sympathize. I think he needs to be held accountable for this action, no matter how harshly his PTSD affected him. With that being said, I worry that my own personal views of retribution are too harsh. My partner believes in giving people second chances, and I often am confronted with my own strict morals. I did try to understand, but inside I cannot change my feelings that bad actions deserve punishment, and even once absolved, they should carry that misdeed as a personal cross to bear. Whether it be murder (with the exception of self-defense), rape, severe drug addiction with its effects on those around them, or cheating, I think these people should not be allowed to move on scot-free.
While I found it hard to get through the book, I think making the effort to finish it was worthwhile. My complaints don’t account for how enriching the informational parts were to me. I feel that I can hold these two things to be true at once. Moving forward, I have new information on how my brain may process events and what I can do to change for the better.
Happy reading,
-Beppa