One of the worst things a grad student can hear is “so, when are you graduating?” Even the best of grad students (whatever that means), with a set and followed timeline, will know it’s not just finishing some classes and leaving. The final thing you must do when completing a research-based degree is defend your thesis/dissertation. That oh-so-simple question calls to mind the journey one is about to embark on in order to finally be set free. Years of work, cumulated in a huge written document, then presented publicly, and then scrutinized by your committee. Despite not having my PhD defense for a few more years still, I got a good taste of it when defending my Master’s thesis back in November. Let me tell you, that was a LOT. Now, after years of grueling lab work and months of being cooped up furiously writing, my lovely partner Alex has defended his PhD dissertation. Obviously, I need to celebrate him.
The time leading up to the defense was rather chaotic, but at the end, everything worked out flawlessly. The night before his defense, I stayed up baking while he made last minute changes and practiced his talk. We went to bed shortly after the sky began to lighten, both thanking our lucky stars that the defense wasn’t until 2pm and we could sleep in a bit.
The next morning, we got ready and put finishing touches on our respective work. When it was time to go, I donned the beautiful, fungal-themed dress he spent the last year making me and forced Alex to drive unreasonably slow for Boston. On my lap I held my too-tall-for-a-container cake, and he rehearsed his talk aloud from memory. Eventually it donned on us that the sky was getting increasingly dark, and it started to downpour just as we arrived.
Alex’s talk was honestly and truly great. Having heard it from the beginning, I can confidently say he really did give his best run on the day of his defense. After, everyone was ushered out and he was held for the closed-door defense. While he was getting bombarded with questions by his committee, I hustled back and finished setting up the decorations. It also gave me a chance to talk with friends, family, and lab mates, which was actually really enjoyable and touching. Being long distance, rarely am I around to get to know or connect with the people in his life. When he was done, champagne was popped (for those who wanted it), cake was cut, and the festivities began.
That night, poor Alex still had to keep moving. We got dinner with his family, then made our way to a semi-outside bar/restaurant area (?) where we met up with one of his closest friends. We wandered a bit, almost crashed an 8th grade graduation party, and shared hot honey pizza. After getting home, I shared my little gifts for him and we immediately crashed.
In the morning, we hopped on a train to NYC with his family. The goal was to get “you fan/油飯” at Wenwen, a celebratory Taiwanese rice dish, but the universe unfortunately did not have it in the cards for us. Instead, we were able to get dinner at 886, which is actually owned by the same folk! Words cannot describe how tasty everything was. We had melt-in-your-mouth pork belly rice called “Lo Ba Beng” (I believe his mom mentioned it’s really called “Lu Rou Fan”), ultra crispy chicken with spicy sauces, cold noodles in a refreshing peanut sauce, and sweet, tender Taiwanese sausage. After dinner, we headed to Little Italy for dessert and to enjoy live music in the summer evening.
Throughout the trip, Alex and I explored around NYC. We stumbled upon the East Village Zine Fair, enjoying talking to various artists and enjoying the punk vibes. Every other chance we got, we stopped for a cold treat, with my personal favourites being a cantelope sorbetto with olive oil + sea salt from L’Industrie Pizzeria and a vegan pistachio gelato form Gelatoville. I’m not sure which was Alex’s favourite, but he got an icecream with cheesecake pieces mixed in from Peter Coop’s Scoops, and even I had to take a bite of this actual dairy (eek!) heaven. We enjoyed all the art in the city, and tried new places without hesitation. One such was 375 Chicken and Fries, where we got buffalo honey chicken and waffles. They were absolutely killer, drizzled in a sriracha mayo and green onion. In hindsight, there was a PB&J option which sounded funky, but it just means we need to go back. Despite our limited time there, it was a great time just exploring, talking to people, and trying new foods!
Now, it’s time for him to get a lot of the second worst questions a grad student, or recent graduate, can hear: “so, what’s next?”
Happy reading,
-Beppa
Hey people!!!!!
Good mood and good luck to everyone!!!!!